


Escape the Darkness

by Chels0320_LovingtheSongbird



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Beth Lives, Depression, F/M, Fluff, Holding Hands, Morning Cuddles, Mornings, Post-Episode: s05e08 Coda, Post-Season/Series Finale, Slow Burn, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-21
Updated: 2015-10-29
Packaged: 2018-03-31 13:01:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 10,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3979015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chels0320_LovingtheSongbird/pseuds/Chels0320_LovingtheSongbird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beth's lost a piece of herself. She's lost the lightness that is now replaced with darkness from having to survive the harshness this apocalypse encompasses without anyone but Edwards. She isn't afraid of the walkers as much anymore, it's the people now that serve the biggest threat. Filled with hopelessness and hatred, she will fight her way through this world until she doesn't have to anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Yes, I Can

**Author's Note:**

> Another TD story?! Yeah, I know but this one just popped in my head while driving today. So I always thought if Beth came back it would be cool if she kind of switched roles with Daryl in some way. As in how we see in Season 5B how Daryl is hopeful to find people and he's pretty much being a better person, where Beth is darker and more closed off. It would show us a whole different character but still be Beth. Put a lot of parallels in there too ;) Mostly going to be Beth for a while, but don't worry... a known archer will show up some time soon ;)

There was a soft, gentle breeze cooling the inhabitants of this cold, dark world. Dead and alive. The woods were mostly quiet as the sun was starting to set. No moans or groans. No screams. Just the sound of a crackling fire and a knife's blade being sharpened. It usually wasn't this quiet but who really could complain?

But if you got too comfortable in this world, that's when you make mistakes. A walker came out of the brush and the noise barricade warned of the approaching threat. With a loud "arrgh" the walker face planted over the barricade into the earth below him. The knife sharpening ended with an annoyed sigh following the interruption. A few steps forward with torn up cowboy boots and a stab through the brain was the end of that.

"Can you at least talk to me?"

Silence again. The knife sharpening continued, more forceful this time. 

"Sometimes... I miss the Beth I used to know."

Beth glared at Edwards, "She died a long time ago." Beth finally got the knife sharpened to her satisfaction and slipped it into her sheath at her waist. She got to her feet, throwing a few twigs on their hidden fire as she grabbed the crossbow beside her.

"Where are you going?" Edwards's exasperated question was left unanswered as she kept walking, lifting her leg over the noise barricade, and setting off into the woods.

She wanted to attempt to find some food before the sun set. When she went earlier she found minimal creatures that weren't the living dead. It was getting colder so she assumed it was getting closer to Fall. She knew if they didn't find shelter or a good group of survivors before winter hit, their chances of survival were slim to none.

She walked slowly until she saw it. A grey squirrel eating an acorn on the soft grass just minding its own business, munching on it's dinner. She crept a little closer and then sent the bolt flying. The poor thing never stood a chance. She retrieved the bolt and her kill and strung it to her waist. She continued on but stopped when she found a mutilated horse. She frowned as she remembered her farm. It was for a split second and then she continued. Dwelling on the past was a waste of time.

It wasn't long after she had continued her hunting that she heard a person following her. By the sound of the footsteps, they were trying not to be detected. Good things she was trained well. A branch snapped right behind her and she turned around, aiming the crossbow right in the stranger's face.

"Woah, you're gonna poke an eye out with that thing." The disheveled man joked.

She kept it trained inches from his face. Then something caught her eye, the man had a large W on his forehead. 'Great, a lunatic. I prayed for a group of people and I get a crazy man with a W on his forehead.' Beth narrowed her eyes at the man, not uttering a word.

"I'm Greg." He came closer to her and stuck his hand out but Beth pushed the crossbow into his forehead. Her voice got serious, "Step... back."

Greg stepped back but only a few inches.

Beth readjusted her crossbow, trying to make a point to him to move further back but he didn't seem to get it. She rolled her eyes, "Keep goin'."

He did, putting a few feet between them this time, "Look, I don't know what kind of guy you think I am but-"

"Shut up. Why were you followin' me?" Beth kept full focus, ready to pull the trigger at any time.

"I just thought you were lost or-"

Beth shook her head and growled out, "Bull shit, no one just follows anyone nowadays so they can make sure they get back home safe. So save it. Tell me the real reason." Beth's hold on her crossbow tightened.

"Come on! I'm a good guy." The man gave a wide grin. "Can't you tell the difference?"

Beth pulled the trigger right before the man went for the gun at his side. Hit him right through the chest, bolt sticking to the target she was going for. His heart. Knocking him to the ground. He had dropped his weapon and as he tried to grab it Beth got to it first. She then bent down and tore the bolt from the man's chest. Before the man could get too noisy, Beth shoved the bolt right through the man's head and pulled it out again. She took out her rag and wiped the surprisingly, unaltered bolt away of the mess that coated it.

"Yes, I can tell." She answered the dead man's question. As she continued on her search for a few more kills before the last few minutes of daylight were taken from her.


	2. The Wolves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for making y'all wait. I wrote this chapter and then decided to rewrite it and have Beth take a different more interesting (also more realistic) path. I'm happy bout this chapter but a little so-so at the same time. It'll start picking up speed in a bit I just have to lay down the ground work.

Beth slowly checked her surroundings, there was still light left but it was disappearing quickly. She still wasn't sure if W man was alone so she decided to weave her way through and through until she was sure no one was following her or could pick up her trail back to camp.

Beth had managed to bag a rabbit and another squirrel but that was it. It was enough for two people although the animals were quite skinny and didn't look the healthiest. They just needed something to get their energy regained for the morning.

Beth plopped down on the ground with her catches. Edwards just watched her as she pulled out a small pocket knife and start to nick the fur down by the private area. When she started pulling the fur off she heard Dr. Edwards slightly gag. This made her chuckle internally but continue partially skinning the rabbit and then made a perfect slice down the stomach.

"How can you do that and not…. The smell alone…" Edwards breathed in.

Beth shook her head, "We gotta eat, don't we?" She let herself go back to the past when Daryl had taught her how to hunt, more specifically the not so glamorous part of it.

***********************************

"I don't know about this, Daryl." Beth sighed as he saw him take the dead rabbit and brought a knife to the fur of its private area.

"Rabbit's not gonna skin itself for ya'. You need ta learn in case…" Daryl cut his sentence off as he explained, "Now you just nick the fur here, and then ya barely cut internally so you don't cut the intestines."

Beth wrinkled her nose and couldn't help the sound she made as he cut into the rabbit.

"Come on, princess. Ya' gotta learn. Ya' gotta eat don't ya?"

************************************

She smiled to herself as she gutted the rabbit and dug her hand in to retrieve the heart, lungs, and intestines. She set them aside. Skinning the rabbit didn't take much because the rabbit was pretty small. She sawed through the neck, then took off all four feet and then cut it in half.

She then stuck a sharp tree limb through both the halves, stuck the meat branch on their pathetic stand and let it sit over their hidden fire to roast. She started on the pair of squirrels next, still ignoring Dr. Edwards.

"Who taught you to do that?" Edwards piped up, obviously getting over his squeamish self.

"The man you people took me away from… Twice." Beth almost cut too deep at the reminder.

"Taking you was wrong. I never agreed with it." Edwards defended himself, watching her intently.

"You did nothing to stop it." She paused. "You're a coward, Edwards. Just like Dawn was."

Edwards shrunk back into the tree he was sitting against. She had fished with the squirrels which had less meat than she thought due to their emaciated state.

After a while Edwards cleared his throat, apparently getting some courage back, "So uh where do we go next?"

Beth messed with the rabbit, turning it over slightly, "North."

Edwards knew she was done talking. She hadn't said a full sentence to him since they left Grady and the fact that he got an outburst out of her was surprising.

"Why?"

Beth stopped messing with the rabbit and let out an annoyed sigh, "Does it matter?"

Edwards snatched the map out of her backpack, "According to the map if we keep going North we're headed for Washington DC."

"Uh huh." Beth agreed halfheartedly, "You have any better ideas?"

"No, I'm just glad to see you still have hope finding them. I thought you lost that." Edwards skimmed the map, acting like he wasn't gauging her reaction to his statement.

"I highly doubt we'll find them. Washington just seems to be a place to start to find anyone. We went to Richmond, found Noah's home in ruins, and now we're moving on. If they aren't dead they're hundreds of miles away by now." Edwards looked up form the map to stare at her. Beth sighed, "I can't dwell on false hope. I'm tired of getting my hopes up." The last sentence was strangled. She did want to see them again, more than anything. But she was done thinking this world was some fairy tale where they all would live happily ever after.

She was about to get the rabbit off the fire when she heard something. It was just a slight rustle. Wouldn't have worried Edwards but she was sure that W man had friends. She slowly picked up her crossbow as she heard another rustle. That was definitely no walker.

Beth aimed it at the brush as the sounds got louder. When the figures emerged there were four men, all with Ws on their foreheads, and three were armed. One guy who didn't have anything pointed at her looked at her crossbow and smiled, "So you took out Greg?" Beth slightly nodded and he shook his head, "That idiot was always getting himself into trouble. Never took no for an answer. We told him you were someone he shouldn't mess with."

Beth got an uncomfortable shiver down her back at the thought of them watching her without her knowledge. They were slick but this also gave her reassurance that these men weren't out for blood. Well, at least not out for hers. They followed her back to her camp and could have killed both of them and taken all their belongings. But they hadn't.

The man could see the gears in her head turning while she was being silent. He continued, "Then ol' Greg told us to watch and learn and well… we all know how that went down."Some of the men gave little laughs behind him. This was one of their own, and they were laughing about it? His voice brought her out of her thoughts again, "You knew he was tracking you the minute he started on your tail, didn't you?" Beth didn't say anything but he knew the answer. He nodded in approval, "That's impressive... Now we don't take in just anybody but you've proven yourself. We have more people at our camp. Granted, you took out one of our own, but he was getting reckless anyways. Would've happened sooner or later.""

There was a long silence between the two groups. Beth didn't know what to say. She knew she shouldn't trust them but they seemed like a strategic group of survivors. Sure, they looked dirty and had Ws on their foreheads but... Beth just didn't know. She wasn't fully convinced that these men could be trusted. But theyw eren't going to stand there all night. She had to make a decision. 

She lowered her crossbow, "Okay. Lead the way."

The man seemed surprised, "To be honest, I thought I was going to have to spend an hour convincing you."

Beth didn't reply just signaled for Edwards to get up.

"Hold on now, we said you could go. You're an asset to us. He's not." The guns were raised toward him.

Beth jumped, "So a doctor ain't an asset to ya'?"

The men lowered their weapons and the man turned his head to her, "A doctor? Well this just gets better and better, don't it? Alright, come on."

Beth retrieved the squirrel and rabbit meat and put it in her backpack. As they were walking Beth's brain would not shut up. She had had two choices: join their group and have a chance of survival with numbers or stay by themselves and hope they found some sort of shelter or another group. In this world, you didn't pass up opportunities of survival. 

Sometimes you just had to take chances.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Beth's with The Wolves O.O... Yeah, so the next chapter will be following Daryl. I got it in my head, just gotta type it out now.


	3. Enemies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl's not to fond of the Wolves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so now we get some Daryl time. I feel like I could have made this longer but I think this is good for now. Enjoy! xoxo

"These damn Wolves are pissin' me off."

Daryl was seething with anger as he walked with Aaron through the Alexandria gates. "Fuckin' shoot at me and then scamper off like cowards. More like fuckin' coyotes if ya' ask me."

Rick came down the porch steps as Daryl was walking by, "They hit you?"

"Nah, but came damn close. Almost took my head off if Aaron hadn't flung us to the ground. I never seen people as stealthy as 'em. Didn't even hear 'em followin' us." Daryl was pacing now, still clearly upset.

Rick looked around at the Alexandrians who had stopped to see what the commotion was all about. Daryl stopped, "We need to do somethin' about 'em before they get any ballsier." 

Rick nodded, "Let's wait a few days, you and Aaron stay here. No one leaves. Let's see if they respect boundaries, and if they don't… we'll deal with them. I'll inform Sasha to pay closer attention."

Daryl nodded and decided to go home to take a rest for a few minutes. Daryl wasn't fond of the the idea of being stuck inside Alexandria's walls but he didn't feel like getting gunned down, either. These people were fast and sneaky. Stealthy. They weren't dealing with just one crazy man with an eye patch or a group of cannibals. Now they were dealing with dangerous animals. The image of the blonde woman tied to the tree flashed through his mind and he shivered. That was some messed up shit.

He made it to the front door of his house, deposited his crossbow on the ground beside the couch, and flopped down.

********************

It didn't seem like he had been out for that long when he heard yelling and his name being called. Daryl grabbed his crossbow and headed for the door.

It was dark so he had to have been asleep for a while. It didn't take him long to see why everyone was yelling. Abraham had a guy in a choke hold, a guy with a W on his forehead, "Sasha shot him in the leg to slow him down, I went out there and got him. His buddies retreated, left his sorry ass behind."

Rick looked at the man yowling in pain at his gunshot wound. Sasha rolled her eyes, "All I did was nick him. The whole bullet didn't even go through him."

Daryl looked at the man and took a hold of his face, "You or one of your friends tried to kill me out there… You gonna tell us about your camp or do I have ta make ya?"

The man spat in Daryl's face and Daryl punched him straight across the man's jaw, hearing a satisfying crack. Daryl started walking away, "Well if he wasn't badly injured before, he is now."

After Daryl walked off toward Aaron, Michonne spoke up, "What do we do with him?"

Rick shook his head, "He's gonna have to be watched, at ALL times. We need information from him." Michonne and Abraham nodded in agreement. Rick continued, "We'll see how much they value lives of their own if they decide to come back… we'll be ready."

"Sasha, you okay to go back up there and keep watch?" Rick asked as he pointed at the guard tower. Sasha nodded and made her way back to the watch tower.

"Abraham, just follow me. I think I know where we can put him for a short period of time 'til I think of somthin better." Rick led the way and Abraham followed with Michonne tagging along.

*******The Next Day*******

Daryl made his way to Rick, "Where is he?"

Rick sighed, "We need him."

"I know that. I just want to see if I can get something out of him."

Rick looked uncertain but then pointed, "He's in the house at the end. Michonne's watching him."

Daryl nodded and made his way to the house, if he was going to be stuck in this place he might as well make himself useful... and by the third punch to the face the man was giving in. Daryl could feel it.

Daryl lowered himself to the man's level in a squat position, "They left you for dead, what do you care if we know how many of you there are?"

The man let out a strangled whimper as Daryl took out his knife.

"OKAY. Okay. Ten." The man shouted.

Daryl wasn't sure if that was truthful but it was more than he'd gotten out of the man in half an hour so it was progress.

"Good, you think they'd come back for ya'?" Daryl moved the knife to hover the point over the boy's thigh, lightly scraping against his wound.

the boy whimpered, "Maybe, it depends if I'm worth it to them." 

"Are you?" Daryl pushed harder against the wound.

A look of helplessness crossed the man's features, "I don't know, it was my first run! Please just stop!"

Daryl nodded. He looked at Michonne who was sitting there quietly.

"I'm done… For now." Daryl walked out to relay the info to Rick. Was it true? They'd find out sooner or later. The one thing he did know for certain is that these Wolves didn't know who the hell they were fucking with.


	4. Good People

The lead man’s name was Luca. The other three were Riley, Hank, and Liam.

She really could care less but she listened as Luca talked. After a while she noticed something. Luca would look at the ground and then slightly change course. It was dark but Beth knew what a man tracking looked like. 

Beth stopped walking, “I thought we were going back to your camp.”

The men stilled in front of Beth and Edwards. Beth had known after the first thirty minutes or so these men were not going somewhere in particular. They were tracking something. And she had a feeling it wasn’t food. 

Luca turned his body around and started walking towards her, her hand that was gripping her crossbow tightened.

“We were following some assholes who took my brother. We lost their trail when we stumbled upon you hunting. There’s two of them and they leave heavier tracks than you do. Back when we were introducing ourselves I saw some tracks, the same tracks of those men.”

Beth glared, “I’m not gonna be a part of this. You said we were going to your-“

Luca got into her space, “You got anything better to do, sweat heart?”

Beth didn’t move back and her glare intensified, “I didn’t agree to come with you to track down a couple of assholes.”

Luca smirked at her and her blood boiled, “Maybe I was wrong about you.”

There was a threat laced in his statement. Beth didn’t take kindly to threats.

Instantly Beth unsheathed her knife and barreled into his chest, successfully knocking him to the ground. She straddled his chest with her knife held across his throat. His buddies of course aimed their guns at her, ready to shoot. Edwards was staring wide eyes at the scene unfolding in front of him. 

“Back off, it’s okay!” Luca yelled. He was trying to play off his fear but Beth could see right through him.

Beth eyed him, “You threaten me again, you better act on it before I do. Are we clear?”

Luca gave a small smile, “Yeah, uh, we’re clear.”

Beth brought her knife away and got up, his men were staring at her like she was a ticking time bomb. 

‘Good.’ Beth thought to herself as she waited for Luca to get up.

Before he could say anything Beth spoke, “Okay, we can track these men down. But I am not involving myself. This is your fight, not mine.” Luca looked confused and she sighed, “If my sister had been taken away from me, I’d want answers too.”

Luca let a smile form and nodded, “I knew there was soft side to you.”

Beth rolled her eyes, “Just do your thing.”

*****************************************

“I think we should turn and head back. He clearly was lying.” Aaron started back towards his car as Daryl nodded, “When we get back, Imma kick that kid’s ass.”

Daryl heard a struggle behind him and turned aiming his crossbow too see a man holding a knife to Aaron’s neck. And then he felt something push up against the back of his head.

“Oh, really?” Luca laughed.

Daryl grimaced as he realized what was going on. 

Shit.

“Ya’ see. My little brother isn’t stupid. He can play scared really well. He told you to come here right? Said the camp would be here? Well he told ya’ right except… this is where we hunt.” Luca stepped into their sight.   
Daryl cursed himself. Why had he believed that little shit? 

**********************************************************

Beth had started leaving when they had found the two men. She didn’t feel like four on two was fair but then again, kidnappers didn’t deserve fair either so she just kept back. She opened her back pack and took out both halves of the rabbit. They were cold but she was starving. She handed one half to Edwards as they started eating.

She could barely hear what they were saying, but she could hear the tones of each man's voice.

“Now we need him back.” Luca paced between Aaron and Daryl.

“We ain’t takin’ you to him.” Daryl growled.

Beth’s ears perked. She could tell that the man had a thick southern, raspy voice. She shook her head and continued eating. 

“Oh we don’t need you two. No… We just need to show your people that we don’t negotiate.”

“You best leave him be!” Daryl yelled.

She didn’t see what happened but she definitely heard the man. And his voice was definitely one she has heard before. She dropped half her rabbit and bounded through the brush, leaving a confused Edwards behind.

Luca turned to her as she came out next to him. He was clearly annoyed by her presence, seeing as she had interrupted his show. 

Beth was frozen. There was a man she had never seen before being held by Riley with a knife to his throat. But the other man. She knew who he was. Daryl Dixon. Liam had a gun to Daryl’s head and she had to keep her heart from exploding at the image of Liam pulling the trigger against Daryl's head.

Daryl’s eyes met hers and she had never seen his face go from a snarling, glare to a shocked, unbelieving look so fast. 

“You said you didn’t wanna be involved.” Luca stated as he and Hank looked at her.

Beth shook her head, “You… You’re gonna let them go…” 

Now Luca was shocked, “To hell I am. These men-”

Beth cut him off, “These men… Are good people.”

“Good people who take people away? I don’t think so.” Luca spat, getting impatient.

Daryl was still playing catch up with his brain. Beth realized they weren’t going to budge on the subject. She nodded, “Okay. You’re right. I'm sorry.” She turned slowly and could almost feel Daryl's stare on her back as she walked a couple of steps away form them.

Luca was beyond confused at her outburst, “Do you know these-“

Beth turned swiftly around and nailed Liam in the leg with an arrow, giving Daryl enough time to unsheathe his knife, swing around, and slice into Liam’s neck. Aaron took the distraction and head butted Riley who was holding him, dislodging the knife from his grasp.

Not having time to load another bolt, Beth drew her gun and shot Hank beside Luca. Daryl grabbed his crossbow from the ground and yelled, “Down!” to Aaron and Aaron ducked as Daryl sent a bolt flying through Riley’s head. 

Luca had thrown himself on top of Beth right as she had shot Hank and brought his knife down towards her chest. She brought her hands to his, holding the knife from stabbing her. She was losing. He had the advantage of being on top and bearing all his weight down into her. She threw all her strength into holding the knife above her chest, right as it barely touched her skin. She yelled in pain as it started digging into her chest.

Then suddenly Luca wasn’t on top of her anymore.

Daryl had drug him off her and threw him to the ground, his crossbow aimed right at him. Without hesitation, he sent the bolt flying through Luca’s head. 

Beth slowly got up and inspected the small indention the knife made. A little blood but nothing serious. After she inspected her minor wound, she turned and was immediately crushed by another body enveloping her into his embrace. She gave a small smile as she brought her arms around his middle and they just stood there. Daryl brought himself away from her for a brief moment, his arms still around her and looked at her face.

She shied away but he brought his hand to her chin and inspected her face. She knew he could see the scars of her past. They were almost invisible but they could still be seen close up. Especially her bullet wound.

He shook his head as he moved some hair from her forehead. His eyes darkened for a second but then slid down to her cheek and she closed her eyes. 

“I thought I’d never see you again.” Beth whispered.

“Ur tellin' me.” Daryl muttered. 

A rustling behind Beth threw Daryl back into defensive mode as he brought Beth behind him and aimed his crossbow at the woods. He felt Beth’s hand on his shoulder, “It’s just Dr. Edwards.”

Daryl looked ober his shoulder at her, “Doctor who?”

Edwards emerged slowly and Daryl lowered his crossbow. He remembered him.

Daryl turned back around to look at Beth. She about jumped out of her skin when he grabbed her face and just stared intently into her eyes.

“How the hell are ya’ alive, Beth?”


	5. Past and Present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back story on how Beth was left at Grady.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW. So um sorry. Life got complicated... really complicated... but I'm back and I missed this story... A lot.

Dr. Edwards cleared his throat and Daryl’s eyes left Beth’s to glance at the doctor. His eyes went back to Beth’s and rested there for a few more moments before bringing his hands from her face. He brought one hand up to his chin, rubbing the hair there. It was a clear gesture of his uncertainty and confusion.

He also gave her some space by taking a few steps back. Beth looked clearly strained and searching, as if she was having trouble finding some clear answer she could give him.

Edwards beat her to the explanation, “After you left her in that jeep in the parking lot, after the walkers ambushed you…. a couple of officers went out in search for supplies you left behind when you had to retreat…”

Beth was silent and staring off into the distance. Daryl didn’t like how she seemed distant. She was uncomfortable. Daryl grunted, signaling Edwards to continue.

“We believed you weren’t coming back…” Daryl nodded and urged him to get on with the story. “The next thing I know, an officer comes in carrying her saying she was left in the car outside… and that he heard her banging inside the car. She had lost consciousness again but not before they located her. I got her on an operating table, fixed her up the best I could, and she woke up a few days later. She shouldn’t be alive, but she is.”

Daryl was feeling all sorts of emotions. Relief, anger, guilt. He knew he had seen her take a breath. He saw her lips part slightly as he was putting her in the back of that car.

**_Months ago…_ **

“She made a sound, damnit! Right as we was putting her in that car.” Daryl was pacing as the group stared at him. When no one backed him up he glared at Tyreese and Sasha. “You opened the back of the car. You saw it to.”

Sasha shook her head, face expressionless, “We didn’t see anything, Daryl. She didn’t make a sound.”

Maggie was the next to speak up, “It hurts me to say this… And I know you’re hurting… We all are… but… Let her… Let her rest in peace Daryl.”

Daryl stopped his pacing and his glare harshened, “In a car? We bury our own… Always have. She deserves better.”

Everyone was silent for a while. They might think he’s gone crazy but he didn’t care. There was no way he was leaving her to rot at that place, nonetheless in the back of a car.

Maggie spoke up again, “There’s no use in killing yourself. Just let it go.”

Daryl’s eyes narrowed at the dark haired Greene sister. When he spoke his words were dowsed in venom, “Rich comin’ from you. You gave up on her the day the prison fell.”

Maggie’s breath hitched and she charged Daryl. He grabbed her wrist before she could slap him and caught her other hand as she tried again. After she calmed down Daryl released her hands, saying nothing. He picked up his bag from the ground and started heading off.

“We can’t wait for you.”

Daryl stopped at Rick’s words.

“Then don’t.” He continued walking.

* * *

 

Daryl crouched behind a rock, breathing heavily. He was down to his last few bullets and the herd just kept growing stronger not weaker. He had his bolts but that was it after the 3 rounds.

His spirit crushed instantly. Even if there had been a spark of life in her when they deposited her in that jeep, she was long gone now. He had failed her once again. He couldn’t save her at the funeral home and he couldn’t save her from Dawn.

He contemplated throwing himself into the walkers. Letting them rip his flesh from his body and devour his worthless being until there was only ruminants left.

_‘You’re gonna be the last man standin.’_

Tears prickled his eyes as he recalled her confidence in him. He slowly brought his body up from his crouching stance behind the boulder. His body resisted, wanting to give up the fight. Each step he took towards the way of the group’s direction, he felt his muscles tighten. His heart ached with the emptiness he felt, a wasteland of useless space.

He stopped. He couldn’t go back to them yet. He just couldn’t. He had to be alone. And he was. For a long while. Days turned into more days, and then more days after that. He tracked the group a safe distance behind but when he decided to finally rejoin, the group hadn’t made a big deal about it. He was relieved because even though he reunited with them, he was far from enunciating one word, nonetheless a conversation. He kept to himself for a while, broken an aching. They hadn’t found food or water and excluding what had happened, the effects were getting to him.

He felt he was deemed a curse filled life. He had lost a little girl, Merle, and a best friend in the course of… almost 3 years? There were plenty of times he thought about ending it all. Just that blissful thought of the pain all going away, the memories flooding out of him as his life slipped from his body. But her voice in his head would always barge its way in. She wouldn’t want that. She was strong enough to overcome and deal with her pain. He would too. He’d never forget but he would live.

**_Present…_ **

His eyes flickered to Beth who was still staring anywhere but at him. He wanted more than anything to tell her about how he tried to go back for her.  

“I tried.” Was all he muttered and she finally brought her eyes to rest on him. She nodded but still said nothing.

He didn’t like that.

“Beth...”

Edwards was about to cut in, clearly seeing this was going to be hard for her but she spoke up.

“Daryl, I don’t blame you.”

Her eyes betrayed what she stated. They were distant and cold. Not the Beth he saw in the funeral house. Not the Beth he escaped the prison with. It wasn’t her.

She tried again but her voice failed her and just uttered a strained whine. She regained her composure and tried again, “I… I understand why.”

Again, her tone was forced.

After a few moments of silence, Aaron cut in, “Its dark, we need to be heading back.”

Beth gave Aaron a sideways look and then cut her eyes to Daryl. He may as well explain.

“We found a community. With walls and houses.”

He didn’t know why he expected her to brighten up, at least show some ounce of hope but it wasn’t there. She stole one more glance at Daryl before focusing her sights on Aaron, “How far?”

Aaron shrugged, “Not far. I have room in my car.”

Beth nodded and beckoned for Edwards to follow her. Aaron gave Daryl a confused look but Daryl just hopped on his motorcycle.

As Daryl was riding in front of Aaron’s car he had time alone with his thoughts. He didn’t think Beth blamed him entirely. She didn’t seem angry, just maybe exhausted. The girl had to have gone through hell before finding them. Maybe with a decent night’s sleep and some food in her system she’d be back to normal. The same bright soul he once knew and came to love.

It was wishful thinking but he had to hold on to some kind of hope.


	6. The Arrival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth and Dr. Edwards arrive at Alexandria with Aaron and Daryl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I'm gonna stop these "not updating" spells. I'm back, I promise.

Beth walked into the foyer of the house Daryl and Aaron had led them too. When they had arrived Beth almost couldn’t believe what she was seeing. It was a community, a very big one at that. And all this time it had withstood this world. It was amazing. It was unbelievable. Sure, they had tall, sturdy walls but that didn’t mean anything in this world nowadays.

Beth ran her fingers over one of the walls in the kitchen. Someone flicked on a light and it startled her slightly. Dr. Edwards was wearing his surprise and excitement more outright than Beth was.

“This is miraculous. All this time, this place has been here?” Dr. Edwards was clearly impressed.

“I’ll show you to your room so you can get some sleep.” Aaron said and Edwards followed but Beth stayed put. Aaron looked over at Beth but Daryl dismissed them. Aaron nodded as he led Edwards away.

Daryl beckoned for Beth to sit but she shook her head, still looking around the house. It was really nice. Like one of the houses her, Maggie, Shawn, and Daddy would see as they would make trips into town to get groceries and what not. Her chest constricted a little and she shoved the memory form her mind.

She was brought out of her thoughts by Daryl’s voice.“The others could be awake.”

Beth stiffened at his words. She wasn’t ready to see anyone else, definitely not Maggie. Was Maggie even still alive?

“How many are still…” Beth couldn’t finish the sentence, she didn’t really want to know the answer if she was being completely honest with herself.

Daryl’s eyes settled on her as he took in a deep breath, “Bob… He didn’t make it. Tyreese died at Noah’s place. And Noah… He-“, Daryl saw the look on Beth’s face and decided to just end his sentence with, “He didn’t make it either.” He paused, trying to think of anyone else then he started again, “Mica and Lizzie too.”

Beth nodded her head. So many casualties and yet, she was standing right here. Right here in this living room. Why was she spared? Why did she deserve to live and them to die? She didn’t. She had just gotten lucky, like she always had survived on. Pure luck. She didn’t know why she felt disgusted with herself. It wasn’t her fault they had died.

She shook her head, “So Maggie’s alive?”

Daryl nodded. Beth was happy, she was. But not as much as she felt she should be. She knew why. If Maggie wasn’t dead yet she would be. So would Daryl. So would Rick. They would all die and she would have to watch and deal with it. It was the main reason why she secretly hoped she would never find them again. She didn’t want to go through another funeral, but it was inevitable.

“You wanna go see her?” Daryl muttered, eyes locked on her.

She shook her head, “No, not… yet.”

Daryl brought his thumb to his mouth and started chewing the thumbnail there as Beth walked over to the fireplace. The next words she said, he had not expected.

“To tell you the truth, I don’t know if I want to see anyone at all.”

He had to have heard her wrong. “What?” He asked, hoping she had something else other than what she had.

She looked up from the fireplace and stared at him, “I… How… Daryl, how am I supposed to go back? How am I supposed to live in a place like this? Like everything is fine and nothing will ever happen to the ones I care most about. Because it’s a lie. It’s a lie Daryl, and I don’t know if I wanna stay around to watch that happen.”

She knew she didn’t make sense. She knew she was being belligerent. But it was how she felt.

It was a long while but Daryl finally spoke, “Beth, you need ta get some rest.” He took a few steps towards her and she took a couple steps away from him. “You’re safe here, Beth. We all are.”

Beth scoffed and actually laughed a little at his response, “No one is ever safe in this hell. Never.”

Daryl was trying to understand, he really was. But he couldn’t wrap his mind around the fact that this was the new Beth Greene. Her hope was completely diminished. He couldn’t accept that.

“Why’d you come here then?” He hadn’t meant for it to come out the way it did but Beth didn’t seem upset by it. She actually looked stumped like she was searching for an answer.

“I don’t know.”

Daryl’s anger and annoyance was getting the better of him, “That’s not good enough Beth. You have ta have a reason.”

Her eyes narrowed, “What do you want me to say Daryl?” Her voice came out strained and whiney.

“I want ya’ to say you came back to be with us. To be here.” Daryl didn’t recognize the pleading tone in his voice.

“I did… I just… It’s gonna take some time.”

Daryl should understand. He should be content with her answer. But he was’t. “How much time Beth? ‘Cause I can’t keep you hidden forever.”

Beth’s voice rose an octive, “I’m not asking for forever Daryl! I’m asking for some time.”

He looked away from her, “What if I come back one day and you ain’t here? You just leave.”

Beth looked down at her feet, “Then… It was for the best.”

“What the fuck does that mean, Beth?” He couldn’t control the anger that was searing thorugh him. She would just leave him again? Just like that? Before she could say anything in response he started again, “No, you don’t get to do that, Beth. You don’t just walk back into a person’s life and then decide to just leave. Just to leave for your selfish reasons.”

Beth took a few steps towards him, “How dare you! Selfish? I haven’t been part of this group and you have done fine without me-“

“I was not fine without you.”

Beth stopped and it wasn’t his words but it was his eyes that switched something in her brain. His eyes conveyed a sadness that Beth thought wasn’t possible for a human to show. She thought she saw a few tears residing in them but she wasn’t close enough to tell.

“Daryl…”

Daryl shook his head walking away from her, “Hurt like hell, ya’ know…” Beth watched him turning away from her, her throat suddenly dry. “Hurt to lose you once… Losing you twice though… That…”

Beth took the few steps forward and forgot about why they were fighting in the first place. She threw her arms around him much like she had at the cabin in the woods. That was such a distant memory. So much time had passed, but it just seemed so natural to be holding him like this.

Though this time his hands came up to hers and at first she thought he was just going to leave them there but he swiveled so he was crushing her into his chest in a suffocating hug. Beth closed her eyes and rested her cheek on his shoulder.

“I’m so sorry.” Beth choked out.


	7. Yeah, I Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Showers. New Clothes. And Nightmares. WARNING: MENTIONS OF ATTEMPTED RAPE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter so I apologize in advance. There will be more to come, I promise

Beth Greene walked into the bedroom and was surprised to realize that this room had similarities to that of her old bedroom at the farm. Same color paint, same curtains, even the bed spread was almost identical. She heard Daryl clear his throat behind her which brought her out of the small trance she had been in. She turned around and looked at him as he nodded towards a door to the side.

“Bathroom’s in there. Sure ya’ wanna get clean.”

Beth couldn’t help but smile at Daryl’s awkward statement and she nodded in thanks as she walked to the door. Before she opened it Daryl spoke up again, “I’ll be downstairs if ya need me.”

Beth’s hand lingered on the door knob, “I think I’ll be fine. Thanks.”

Daryl nodded and slowly turned to where the stairs were. Beth watched him descend down the stairs and then turned the knob to get a very much needed cleansing.

When she exited the bathroom, hair towel dried and teeth brushed, she was amazed by the quiet. After being in the woods for a long time, a person got used to the hoot of an owl or leaves scattering around. Or the undead moaning and groaning. Beth was sure if a needle dropped, she would most definitely hear it.

She was surprised to see new clothes sitting out on her bed. A pair of black sweatpants, a white t-shirt with a logo on it, and some boxers. Beth smiled at the thought of Daryl rummaging through the house for these and setting them on the bed for her.

He really did care for her. A lot.

Beth had known he had. Back at the funeral home, he had made that obvious. But for some reason through her delirious state she had not wanted to believe it. A small part of her still didn’t want to believe it. That would mean there would be that much more heart ache. That much more pain.

She had been dead. At least that’s what she remembers. The bright light. The peace she felt. It was all real. She was able to escape that demonized world and be free.

Then, before she could even start enjoying it, all that was whooshed away. She had had a searing pain in her head and she panicked when she realized she was in the back of a jeep. She had at first thought it had all been a dream. The hospital and everything and she was still being driven by her kidnappers. Then through the haze of her immense pain she realized the jeep wasn’t moving.

She didn’t know what else to do but start banging on the back window. She hadn’t expected anyone to hear her but the back suddenly opened and suddenly arms were around her and suddenly she blacked out again.

Beth didn’t remember anything after that until she finally awoke… In Grady Memorial Hospital.

 

**_Past…_ **

“You’re being selfish.”

“I’M being selfish?! ME?!”

“I saved you and-“

“You mighta saved me but I didn’t want your help. I NEVER wanted your help.” Beth threw a book at Dr. Edwards and lifted herself out of bed.

“I was totally fine leaving this all behind. You couldn’t have just left me?” Beth was a little unstable but got her bearings quick.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Somewhere that doesn’t involve a damn hospital.”

**_Present…_ **

****

She had had nightmares for a while now. Every night almost. And this night was no different. It was the one with Gorman and a few men Beth and Dr. Edwards had come upon along their journey. She could still feel their hands, she could still smell their smell as they had grabbed her and abused her. If she hadn't learned a few simple combat moves from Daryl she would hate to think of how far those men would have gone. None had ever succeeded, but it still haunted her. The question “But What If?” haunted her.

She didn’t even know she had been screaming. Until she felt a hand grab her arm and shake it. She could hear her name being screamed too.

Her eyes fluttered open and they met Daryl’s whose eyes were concerned and scared. She was sweaty and clammy. Her heart was still pounding in her chest, almost as if it wanted to break out of her chest and run away.

She looked down at his hand gripping her forearm and she sighed, “Just a bad dream, Daryl. It’s okay.”

Daryl shook his head but said nothing. He just stared at her as she slowly got out of his grasp and turned on her side away from him. Not saying another word.

She heard him let out a deep breath and she felt the bed dip slowly behind her. She didn’t even flinch when she felt him behind her, arms coming around her waist to rest above her stomach.

Beth looked down at his hands and then whispered, “I’m fine Daryl, ya’ don’t haveta-“

“Yeah I do, Beth.”

His words silenced her and she could feel her body instantly relax in his arms. Soon after both their breathing slowed and they were both back to sleep in mere minutes.


	8. Stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beth's first morning/ day in Alexandria.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is late. I KNOW. But this new job is wearing me out y’all! It’s a short chapter but it’s sooooo sweet :)

The rest of Beth’s dreams were peaceful through the remainder of the night. She dreamed of her family but not just of Maggie and her Daddy. She dreamt of her Momma and Shawn too this time. She felt really safe and relaxed. She almost felt as if it was real, and reality was a dream. She wished this place was reality.

This place made her feel really warm and safe.

It wasn’t long after enjoying her peaceful dream that her eyes fluttered open. Daryl was still holding onto her but during the night he had rolled onto his back, bringing her with him. She must have been so knocked out that it hadn’t woken her up. She was staring right up at his face, slowly realizing her arms were also wrapped around his solid frame.

Beth let out a sigh, struggled but finally got her arms free from around him, and went to move out of his grasp. In response, Daryl grumbled something and squeezed tighter around her. She almost let out a wheezed giggle but held it in.

“Daryl, ya gotta let me go.” Beth whispered.

“Nah.” Daryl’s whole body turned into her which brought his face into her neck, nuzzling and burying itself in the crook. The prickle of his facial hair against the smooth skin of her neck sent goosebumps all over her body. She shivered at the sensation and realized quickly the warmth she felt from his body heat was spreading to other places. Places that made her blush intensely.

Beth let out an involuntary moan as she once again tried to pry herself from the man whom was tightly enveloping her in his embrace. She finally just let out a huff and pouted.

Daryl’s eyes opened and there was a hint of a smile tugging at his lips.

“You’re an ass.” Beth grumbled as his arms finally let her go. She hurriedly got out of the bed and before Daryl could take offense to her actions she yelled, “I was about to pee all over you!”

She had never heard Daryl laugh. Like an actual hearty laugh but from the bathroom door she heard his gravely laughter as the sound of the mattress springs squeaked from his body leaving it baron.

* * *

She smelt like him.

She smelt like Daryl Dixon.

And she didn’t mind one bit.

The smell of cigarettes laced with blood and sweat. It should have a name. Although it wasn’t entirely pleasant, she liked the manly essence of it. The smell of a working man. A man who protected his own. A man who protected her.

She couldn’t even remember the last time she had had a dream that didn’t involve monsters who wanted to eat her or men who wanted to take her and use her. For a long while she just wished she wouldn’t dream or just not remember the dream when she woke up. But last night, she had dreamed a heavenly dream. One of the best dreams ever since the apocalypse happened. She had felt safe and protected. The only thing that changed was that Daryl had been there, holding her.

She looked at herself in the mirror and was surprised to see the dark circles that had formed under her eyes were faded. Her eyes were brighter too. A lighter blue than normal. Not that she had a mirror at all times while she was with Dr. Edwards after Grady had perished but she would catch glimpses of herself from car windows and broken shards of glass. During that time she spent with Dr. Edwards, she had felt as if the world had added on a decade to her life but now, as she looked over her face in the mirror, she was starting to look her age again. Younger.

She exited the restroom as Daryl was exiting the bedroom. They both looked at one another and just stared for a few moments. As if they had their own telepathic language between each other.

“Hungry?” Daryl asked as he started walking towards her.

Beth nodded, a small smile forming on her lips, “Yeah.”

Daryl nodded and walked past her and she followed him down the stairs. They got to the dining table and Daryl pointed to one of the chairs, “Sit. I’ll make ya’ somthin’.”

Beth was about to insist that she could help him but his eyes were serious. Beth sighed in response but moved to one of the chairs and sat. Daryl nodded in approval and continued to the kitchen.

The kitchen was close enough she could still talk to him, “So how’d ya find this place?”

There was a slight pause to the rustling he was doing but then it continued as he spoke, “The guy I was with. Aaron. He found us. He scouts for people. We scout for people. Good people.”

Beth smile came back but it was full grin now, “So you do think there are still good people around.”

Daryl kicked opened the door and came out with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and Beth’s heart stuttered in her chest. But she almost had heart attack in response to his next words.

Daryl sat her plate down and then sat next to her with his plate, “Yeah. Wasn’t for you, don’t know if I would’ve.” Beth’s silence made him slowly look up at her from his sandwich. He shook his head, “Hell, you’re livin’ proof we need to keep lookin’.”

This man. Daryl Dixon had changed. And in the best ways possible. He still looked the same, darker and shaggier, but still the same overall but his persona had changed.

Beth felt it was appropriate. She brought her hand to his and squeezed as his eyes fell upon hers, “Daryl, I don’t know what to say.”

Daryl’s eyes flickered to her hand on his and suddenly brought his hand up so their fingers laced together.

At that moment, she was sure she had died in that bedroom. Or in that field where those mean had almost killed Daryl and Aaron. Somehow she had died and went to heaven and this was where she got to spend the rest of her days. At a dining table with Daryl, eating PB&J sandwiches, and with their hands laced together.

Daryl sighed and squeezed her hand like she had did to his a couple of seconds ago. He spoke so low it was almost a whisper, “Jus’ say you’ll stay. That you wanna stay.”


	9. Trigger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We find out more about Beth's time without the group.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am really loving how this story is turning out. Now if life could just continue to let me have fun, that would be awesome.

Beth didn’t know why it was so complicated. Why it was so damn hard to say she would stay. Why wouldn’t she? Alexandria had walls. They had the manpower. Protection, shelter, food, clothing. It’s simple, Beth. Just say it. And she was about to but before she could finally say it there was a knock at the door.

She didn’t know why but she immediately got up, breaking their hands apart, and was immediately panicked. Memories of people, grotesque men, barging into Dr. Edwards and Beth’s temporary “safe house” and almost succeeding in taking her. Grabbing at her with their grimy hands and shouting out obscenities that made her blood run cold. Remembering that even with Edwards there, she still was alone and fending for herself because he was too useless and too afraid to help her.

Daryl grabbed a hold of her shoulders and she pushed at his chest to let her go. He held on even when she slapped him hard. She felt the tears before it registered in her brain that she was crying. She never cried. Not anymore. And it was ridiculous to be freaking out like this. A tiny part of her brain knew that, but the rest of her brain had thrust images at her. Of men killing everyone she loved and cared about. Daryl. Maggie. Glenn. Rick. Carol. All of them, on the floor next to her feet dead and she was next.

Daryl was lightly shaking her, “Beth, ’s okay. ‘S probably jus Rick.”

Daryl’s calm tone did not soothe her like it should have. Instead her brain short circuited and she yelled at him, “But what if it’s not?! Those men, they found me. They’ll kill you and then me. I can’t…”

Daryl’s eyes narrowed and his stomach lurched as he felt his whole body heat up with rage, “No one’s comin’ to get ya’. Won’t let ‘em.”

Beth was still resisting him and managed to push his grip off of her. When he looked up at her he hadn’t expected the cool, dark expression she was now giving him, “Like last time you tried to protect me?”

Daryl took a step back as if her words had literally sliced his heart open. Mouth slightly open and eyes blank. Beth raised her hand to her mouth, not wanting to believe she had just said those words. Beth wanted to crawl under a rock at that very moment. She hadn't meant it. Or had she? No, she hadn't mean it. He had tried, she knew that. Her getting taken away was not his fault. And she wanted to tell him that. She wanted to plead that he'd forget what she'd just said, as if she could erase the words form his memory.

He was still silent, still had that hurt expression on his face. She had to say something so she attempted to set things right, “I didn’t-” She sniffed and regained some of her composure and tried to explain herself, “It wasn't your fault. I know that." Daryl still said nothing but his lips came together and it looked like he was gritting his teeth in anger. Which why shouldn't he be angry? She had hurt him bad. She had lit his honor and strength in flames as if she had poured gasoline on both those characteristics and set it aflame.

Her shoulders fell in defeat and she let out a whimper. She felt like falling to the ground and curling up in a fetal position. Just like she did when Edwards was sleeping and she was on watch. She would be awake but just holding herself together so she wouldn't have another panic attack.

Daryl was still silent and whoever was knocking, continued to knock. Finally she choked out, "I can't stay because... I can’t be saved. They’ll find me and they’ll hurt all of you. They’ll make me watch and then take me.” Beth’s tears were flowing down her face and the way she had said those words made something inside of Daryl break.

He surprised her when he closed the space between them and gathered her up in a strong embrace. She didn't deserve this. She didn't deserve this man. And then he finally spoke, “Ya’ can be protected. Ya’ can be saved.” He said as he brought his forehead to hers. “I know ya’ can, Beth. Ya’ ain’t all gone and no one is gonna come.”

Beth’s arms went around his waist and hung loosely as they stood there. She started to calm down and the darkness slowly etched its way from her mind. The fear was still there but that was fading too. Slowly but surely.

“Oh my...”

Beth came apart from Daryl to the sound of a familiar voice. She immediately froze and her heart stopped. There stood Maggie Greene. Her eyes wide and hand over her mouth. Beth’s sister was just a few feet from her and even Beth couldn’t believe it. Beth was sure she needed time before she saw Maggie but now all Beth wanted to do was run into her sister’s arms and never be let go.

“Beth?” Maggie’s voice sounded choked and strained. Beth smiled and nodded as a fresh new wave of tears renewed in her eyes.

Maggie was the one to come forward and wrap Beth in a hug. Beth returned the hug as Maggie began crying in unison with her sister.

Beth was given a very simple tour of Alexandria. Maggie had insisted and Daryl had almost told her that Beth needed to take this place in small bites but Beth had beat him by saying she would love too. Daryl couldn’t hide his confusion but she gave him a knowing smile as she let Maggie lead the way.

No one asked her how she survived. No one asked her how she got to Alexandria. No one really seemed to care. The only thing that her group cared about was that she was home safe and nothing else mattered. There was a huge event planned for her welcoming but it would come later. Even she agreed with Daryl when he suggested they take a rain check on the party.

When they got to Rick’s house she didn’t have to guess whose cries were coming form within the house. Rick came out with Judith cuddled in his arms and he was absolutely floored when he set eyes on the younger Greene sister.

Shock soon turned into a big and bright smile as he came down the porch stairs. He looked down at Judith and then to Beth and Beth started to shake her head but Daryl nudged her towards them.

Beth gave a small, nervous smile as she held out her arms towards Rick who gingerly handed Judith over to her.

Beth was having flashbacks again. But good ones. Ones of taking care of Judith and singing to her. Memories of her father and the prison. Of how safe she had felt and how quickly it had been taken from them as well. She pushed the bad memories successfully away as she smiled at the child in her arms.

Maybe she could heal. Just maybe this would be enough.


End file.
